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Cultivating erotic friction and a sense of desire is what couples need to help them stay active in the bedroom. Long-term relationships particularly need help in this regard. Please let me explain. ;-)

Being comfortable reduces your libido.

When you are in a long-term relationship, you become comfortable by co-existing with one another and creating what I call sameness (familiarity). You like the same food or know what each other likes, the same locations for holidays, the children come along, the pets, the living habits in general. Indeed, as you grow together, you often reduce your differences naturally - it's called relating. When this happens, the erotic friction drops, and then, unfortunately, the flavours and spice also drops. To be more precise, you and your partner are still in love; however, the relationship isn't sparky anymore. Those 'ohh lah lah cheeky grins' are few and far between and can even seem like hard work sometimes.

• The importance of cultivating differences in a long-term relationship:

As you do things separately, you are more likely to feel vibrant and alive. For example, you can enjoy some hobbies (art to adventure) and enjoyable time with your friends (without your spouse). These activities can help you bring the spark back because differences generate an intriguing vibe, thereby turning each other on in the erotic or desire sense!

Yes, when you feel and look different from your spouse, you are more sensually alive. It's your responsibility to get into some differences, create space and explore your sensuality by being self-responsible. Don't wait until your love life has become seriously dull and distant that you end up pointing the finger away from you. It's time to take action now.

In life, you either wait or create. Waiters usually wait until something happens to them, whereas creators proactively take action and happen to things. So, instead of waiting for something to happen, why not be proactive and create erotic friction now?

The fact that you are reading this article means you are probably a creator because you are looking for reliable solutions already. You know it's your job to turn yourself on, your pleasure on & your happiness on.

• Private Coaching or Online Sessions - (

Unless you do something different, you'll most probably be feeling a sense of confusion, heartache, misaligned in communication, and the s*x is no longer connective or hot – name a few.

If you are looking for specific techniques and strategies to have a better understanding of why your relationship isn't working, let's connect with a phone consultation. This service is for individuals and couples who are ready to tackle the self-doubt, awkwardness and embarrassment of exploring erotic desire in a mainstream culture where these essential topics are taboos.

With a mixture of modalities, through facts and myths about high and low libido & learn how the false ideas we believe about s*x stop us from having the fulfilling, passionate love lives we desire and deserve. You'll learn how and why desire dwindles in relationships and how to change it effectively.


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