Updated: Mar 8, 2020
People tend to look for a professional or GP for help when they have these very common concerns: Ejaculation Control Issues, Erectile Dysfunction (ED), Anorgasmia (not able to reach orgasm), Low Desire, Anhedonia (inability to feel pleasure), Pelvic Pain, S*x Addiction, P*rn Addiction, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Sexual Trauma, Paraphilic Disorder, Gender Dysphoria, Relationship Issues, Ageism (too old or too young) as well as Sex and Disabilities.
Now I’d like to show you the real differences between what a clinical s*x therapist can offer and what a somatic s*x coach (bodyworker) can offer in terms of supporting people in this regard.
• What does a clinical s*x therapist do?
A clinical s*x therapist uses standard cognative and behavioural therapies. For instance, after the diagnosis, they may recommend mindset exercises to deal with issues; because the felt sense is not an option most probably believe in surgery, normalisation and gender binary, so they give you “either or” choices. Most of these experts give you talk therapy as a solution to your problems.
When best-selling author Gala Darling asked Spiritual & Meditation Teacher Sah D'Simone why he has so many dance videos on his Instagram page, Sal D’Simone famously said, “Talk therapy alone will not solve the real problem; we must move our bodies joyously.” That is very enlightening and mind-blowing.
A clinic s*x therapist can treat your triggers, traumas and traits by addressing the cognitive behavioural patterning behind your choices and using a 'narrative based' style of therapy to help you work through it.
Yes, a clinical s*x therapist can treat the symptoms of your concerns, which is also very valuable. But when it comes to treating the root cause of an issue, you would be well-advised to consider the somatic s*x education approach.
• What does a somatic s*x coach do?
A somatic s*x coach it is our job to create a safe environment by teaching boundaries so clients become curious about themselves and their relationship to s*x and s*xuality. There is no fixing, advising or setting you straight. As a coach we only gives safe & wanted touch that is client-led and provides choice & voice empowerment in this process. Through embodiment, felt sense practices and pleasure practices (these practices are not always s*xual), we offers sexual knowledge and anatomy education as well. Besides, this work is best characterised by a combination of individual learning zones and community; this client-focused approach has good ethics and integrity, too.
For the past five (5) years my experience is that when people are held in a safe, loving and open space where they can learn and explore 'themselves', their anatomy, their sensations, their body's through touch - magic just happens! When you touch a person without an agenda so they can learn morea bout themselves it is powerful and extremely healing. This work is so important as the modern world is taking the human out of being human.
In conclusion, if you are looking for a holistic approach that can address the root cause of your concern, getting some professional help from a somatic s*x coach should be very beneficial because this approach is beyond treating symptoms.
(by Wala Truscott, Certified Somatic S*x Educator, Sexological Bodyworker, Urban Tantra Teacher & Intimacy and Attraction Facilitator)