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WHY ARE MEN SO ATTRACTED A WOMAN'S SOFTNESS?



Why are men so attracted to a woman’s body and her softness?


A major study shows that men find feminine women most attractive. Researchers conducted this study through showing men photos of different women: some women wear suit jackets and suit pants, whereas other women wear lace dresses, pearl necklaces and high heels – almost all men who participated in the study indicate that they like women who wear more feminine outfits.


We’re heading into an era where ‘anything goes’; however, attraction is cultivated by space, polarity (opposites) and differences. Therefore, we need to give this some thought.


Further examination reveals that men are attracted to elements that can’t appear on themselves – usually, cis-men don’t wear skirts with prints such as love hearts, butterflies and flowers & men probably don’t carry pink handbags with cute ribbon bows; therefore, they find these feminine elements extremely attractive and utterly irresistible.


  • A man needs space to be useful in order for him to feel 'like a protector' and allow him to 'love and support' his partner.


A man’s basic instinct is to profess, provide and protect. That means he wants to feel like a protector; he needs to feel capable, powerful and masculine/impactful; he is biologically programmed to serve a purpose or he’ll always wonder what he has to offer.


More specifically….


  1. Profess: He wants to tell his partner that he loves her and let his family & friends know that she is who he wants.

  2. Provide: He is willing to support his partner more than financially, he must provide unquestionable loyalty, certainty, security, integrity and fully contribute love and support to the household and his family.

  3. Protect: He is keen to protect his partner because that kind of certainty is what creates erotic polarity, i.e. he is there to give her attention, affection, love and protection, while she is there to receive his input lovingly - he wants her to feel secure.


  • A woman’s basic need is to feel loved and supported by the masculine energy.


As women, there is a lot of power in softening our hearts and our bodies, but sadly, this is not valued in the modern world because it’s not measured (unlike productivity, money and results). Indeed, in modern-day society, women have been conditioned to compete with men in many ways; consequently, the romantic relationship between a man and a woman sometimes becomes a power game in this day and age and that’s not even remotely romantic. And, this is a skill that I teach in The Available Woman and trust me, when you really value the power of softness your entire relationship will change.


There is a lot of power in softening our hearts and our bodies.

I’m not saying women shouldn’t have jobs, but I would like to point out that there is nothing empowering if women don’t have the option to soften; nowadays most women focus on to-do-lists that seem never-ending or their partner feels more like just another child. This becomes unbearable for a lot of women because they’re competing or taking instructions from men during the day at the workplace. I know this isn’t the most popular comment to say these days; however, it’s the uncomfortable truth: oftentimes, women who have high-profile jobs find it harder to live in their feminine energy; as a consequence, they are still in their masculine mode after work, yet that’s not the ideal way to communicate with their partners, and they can’t even remember how to soften, how to allow themselves to be cared for by another, how to let go of the small stuff.


Women don’t have the option to soften.

Ultimately, this means women become hardened, numb in their bodies and pleasure just feels like one more thing they ‘have to do’. A woman’s body softens with little and often practices designed for a woman’s body and this rarely involves nudity, genitals or orgasm.


If you are a modern woman looking to soften your heart and your body while connecting with your feminine energy, please feel free to book a 15-minute free call with me.


Wala xo

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