Barefoot Couple
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How to maintain a secure emotional connection with your partner?


Once you’ve been with someone for a while, it’s your responsibility to maintain a secure emotional connection with your partner. Don’t wait until your partner begins to work on this area; create opportunities to strengthen the loving relationship now – In life, you either wait or create! Be a creator, make changes.


Strategy 1: Create meaningful words that only you two understand.


If you think your partner will like it, give them a flattering nickname (e.g. “Prince Paul” or “Princess Mia” – In terms of which nickname to choose, it depends on the situation when you want to give your partner a nickname). The nickname has to be something that your partner finds endearing, or you'll only create the opposite effect of your intention. This kind of cuteness is something just between the two of your, and its fun and much more interesting than plain ole "Paul" and "Mia". 


Strategy 2: Push and pull – it’s a tease.


The push-and-pull technique is one of the essential methods in many areas (e.g. dating & relationships, sales & marketing, etc.). When it comes to using this technique in dating and relationships, I’d like to introduce a few good examples for you:


  • You have time to catch up with your partner for a coffee in the afternoon, but you have to attend a business dinner later, so you need to end the date early - so keep this coffee flirty and fun it's not the time to get into bills and anything too serious.


  • When you are having a date with your partner, put your phone away and be completely present. When your partner’s attention strays, you're ultimately on a date by yourself – send them a text message to get off their phone if you have too!


  • If your partner begins to take you for granted, it’s time for you to book a trip away for a week (alone or with a close friend). You say this to your partner, “Nothing serious, "My Prince", just for some R&R.”


Occasionally spending some time apart is suitable for a romantic relationship – I know this could sound a bit surprising or unexpected, but please let me explain.


Building a deeper emotional connection doesn’t mean you must spend as much time together as possible. In a romantic relationship, you must keep that spark going once you and your partner are in the comfort stage.


I’m not saying your partner will get bored of you if they see you too much, yet they will start to be so used to having you around that they don’t realise how much they appreciate you.


Several days apart will make your partner realise the qualities they like about you, the things they miss and saying bye for some time will make saying hi again much more stimulating.


Remember: spending a bit of time apart from each other can keep that excitement in the relationship fresh.


By the way, this is not playing hard to get. As an independent and irresistible individual, you are hard to get. Don’t forget the saying, “You can’t be too hard to get, or the cat loses interest.” Therefore, you want to be loving and affectionate, but also be busy and have standards at the same time.


Strategy 3: Share new experiences with your partner.


When you pursue new activities with your partner, it bonds you closer emotionally. That explains why vacations are a huge step forward for a relationship – because two individuals have a new and unique experience together that creates a solid bond due to the shared memory.


It doesn’t necessarily mean you must book your flight now. You can experience new activities together today. What is an exciting new café you keep saying to go? Or that museum you have wanted to browse around? It can even be a wine-tasting event or a picnic. It doesn’t matter what it is, so long as it gets you and your partner out of your boring daily routine and into something you can enjoy together.

Thank you for trusting yourself and wanting to learn more,

Big hugs,

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